11 things I like about Britain

Given I fly out in exactly 24 hours (hopefully since Heathrow is covered in fog and the number of flights permitted to land/takeoff has been halved - the 90 second safety factor gets doubled!), I thought I'd end my UK based blogging for the year with a positive note about this country I now call home. There is a lot to be negative about, so I figured I should spontaneously think of 10 good things and found 11:

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1. Comedians. The UK has some of the best comedians in the world. The highlights this year have been Russell Brand (probably considered the sexiest man on UK television), Dara O'Briain, Charlotte Church, Phil Jupitus are all people who have stood out as being extraordinarily funny. Paul Merton and Ian Hislop deserve a mention for Have I Got News for You, as does Simon Amstell on Never Mind the Buzzcocks. I'll even mention the million pound man, Jonathan Ross. Without these people UK TV would largely be pretty dire. Even Jeremy Paxman, who is by and large a serious journalist on Newsnight has a brilliant wit.

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2. Stage and theatre. London is almost unrivalled in talent and variety. It makes this city alive and after a while you take it for granted.

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3. Newspapers. You simply can't read the NZ Herald or the Dominion Post ever again for anything other than local interest stories and the very occasional columnist after devouring the Telegraph or the Times, or even the leftie Guardian. This is journalism at its best. Comparing these newspapers to NZ papers is like comparing 1st year undergraduates to their lecturers. The tabloids are just funny, especially the Sun and the News of the World.

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4. Friendliness of northerners and the Scots. Now it might be an exagerration to say they are either really friendly or ready to mug you, but almost all of the people in "the north" that I have met have been friendly and helpful. There is another side, but I'm going to be positive and many of you don't know what "Chav" means.

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5. Variety. It's not the best place to shop in Europe, but you can buy almost anything. Big population means specialisation. It may take some looking but you can find most things here. Of course I mean in London, this doesn't apply much the further you get out of town. Variety also means concerts, it means people (40% of people in London are not from London).

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6. Pride in appearance. So many people dress so much better here than in New Zealand (I don't mean Chavs). Classy, sophisticated, imaginative and individual. Women are wearing short skirts in 2 degrees weather. In other words, many people try harder here to look their best. Going to the corner shop on a Sunday does not mean dressing like a slob - well where I live anyway.

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7. Gordon Ramsay. This man is a culinary and business god. His original restaurant may outclass all of his others by a mile, but he is THE inspirational chef. He is passionate, hard working, intelligent, loves the food and the appearance and tolerates NO fools. If only a tenth of people in Britain were like him...
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8. "Take the piss" game shows on TV. I have mentioned Have I Got News for You, Never Mind the Buzzcocks, but there is also QI. Forget nonsense like Deal or No Deal, these shows are funny, irreverent, witty and very clever. The Americans find it hard to make fun of themselves for fear of offending each other, NZers can only do it between close friends, but the Brits are brilliant at playing games which don't really matter in order to crack jokes.

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9. Properly heated and insulated homes. How do New Zealanders survive, especially down south, without central heating? In Britain nobody needs dehumidifiers, everyone has central heating and you wonder why NZ's asthma rate is so high?

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10. Transport hub for the world. Heathrow and Gatwick (and Eurostar). The greatest hubs in the world, makes it cheap and easy to go virtually anywhere. Eurostar means Paris is not far over 2 hours away by the end of next year and Brussels already is. If it gets a bit much, it is easy to leave.
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11. Irreverence for the royal family. Where else can you joke about the Queen's husband being a murderer, where else can you talk about the sovereign's grandchild as Harry the Nazi, where else can it be the norm to take the piss out of the next in line for the throne? In many countries you'd be executed, in Britain they are an object of affection and fun. Brits can laugh at themselves, and that is perhaps the greatest thing of all.
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Merry Christmas Brits, have fun and take care, and try not to fight.

Annoyed? Start a petition

10 Downing Street has a website where people can lodge serious petitions to the PM about various issues. If you ever wonder why Nanny State is alive and well in Britain, then consider the thousands of petitions that, by and large, statists promote for the government to run other people’s lives. Most of the ideas are crazy, showing how many people think the government is omnipotent and should be all encompassing (and authoritarian). Some of the funniest petitions that are still open (not rejected!) are:
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- Charge fat people more for using public transport when they take up more than one seat space;
- Bring back public flogging;
- Get people to stop bullying other people;
- Stop wives from nagging men
- Require eggnog to be available at all licensed premises at advent;
- Extend child benefits to cats (petitioner's name is Mrs Cat);
- Forbid hairdresser and fish and chip shop owners from giving their shops silly names;
- Keep HP Sauce in Britain;
- Cut taxes on lingerie, sex toys, chocolates and cigarettes;
- Make Spanish the only language taught at schools;
- Ignore petitions with poor spelling;
- Ensure exterior lights point downward to avoid light pollution of the sky at night
- PM to stand on his head and juggle ice cream;
- Move Parliament to Bradford;
- Dis-establish the Church of England and ban creation of new religions;
- Force house prices down to 25% of their current value;
- Ban all online petitions including this one
- Recognise Borat as leader of Kazakhstan
- Acknowledge fetishism and sadomasochism as sane sexual practices
- Replace God Save the Queen with Gold by Spandau Ballet as the National anthem

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Marian Hobbs's imminent retirement

David Farrar (who was campaign manager for Mark Blumsky's attempt to unseat Hobbs in 2005) reports on Wellygirl's report that Marian intends to retire from politics. This has been confirmed by Newstalk ZB so it then leaves Wellington Central wide open for Bernard Darnton :) doesn't it now?

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I first heard of Marian when she stood for Labour in the Selwyn by-election after Bolger stabbed Ruth Richardson in the back, and Marian came third against as the Alliance's halfwit extraordinaire John Wright came second. She won a list seat in 1996 and I shuddered when she defeated Richard Prebble in Wellington Central in 1999, reflecting both a swing against the government and changed electoral boundaries losing parts of Ngaio and gaining parts of Brooklyn and Newtown.

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As much as I despise most of her politics, I found her to be a good natured person and has a great sense of humour. While she was once a communist, she has also been pragmatic. She is prepared to listen and debate, and will actually read the entire content of a Cabinet paper. In short, after a rather difficult start (the 5th teletubby - Boo Boo nomenclature arrived quickly), she gained the respect of colleagues and bureaucrats for working hard and being willing to engage. In that sense, as a person, she will be missed.

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I followed her on the electoral trail twice with the Libertarianz candidates in the past two elections and she was always respectful and considerate of other candidates and their rights to speak and debate. She was probably not best suited to the lies, nastiness and vapid nature of politics, but very well suited as an auntie and someone to sit and have a good natter with.

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I never voted for Marian (I mean she is Labour, sheesh!), but she was, by and large a rare breed. A rather honest politician. She would rarely promise what couldn't be delivered and while she certainly is a socialist, she also knew some of the limits of her politics. Though I am sure I couldn't convince her that she committed many mistakes, most of them involve voting with the Labour Party since 1996 :)

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In an age when so many politicians are either vindictive, treacherous or complete political whores - it is something worth noting. I hope she enjoys her retirement.

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PS: It was Bernard's birthday on Monday, he is a ripe old 34, as one of the political heroes of 2006 he deserves that to be noted. Cheers Bernard!

2006 in politics

UK political winner: David Cameron. Proof that there is a year long honeymoon period in politics for the nice young man who smiles, utters vapid catchphrases and “listens” to everyone. He has made the Tories electable by making them New Labour Lite.

UK political loser: Tony Blair. With national popularity at an all time low, not loved by the party he saved or the man likely to succeed him, Blair has visibly aged as he slowly plods to his retirement. You’d think after winning a record third successive victory for Labour he’d still be their hero.

UK political nutcase: Ken Livingstone. Red Ken has always been a socialist maverick, but flying at taxpayer’s expense to Cuba and then Venezuela to try to meet Castro and Hugo Chavez, being snubbed by both and unable to pull off a deal he claimed could be done to get cheap diesel for London buses was outrageous. Now he is calling for a wealth tax on City bonuses, could there ever be a Mayor who if let off the leash would single mindedly destroy the goose that lays London’s golden egg? The Tories also deserve a brickbat for being unable to find a suitable candidate to put up against him – this is London, surely SOMEONE can be found who is talented.

Number 1 UK political theme: Environmentalism. The Stern Report predicted doom and gloom if climate change wasn’t addressed, without explaining how it could be addressed when most greenhouse gas emissions come from other countries. The media is full of obsessions about carbon footprints and Protestant guilt about flying to holiday destinations, which can be easily offset by the latest tithe – paying to offset your carbon emissions. It doesn’t of course, but hey it makes people feel better. Recycling is the national obsession, with EU targets for recycling and some councils fining people for NOT recycling. Meanwhile, rubbish collection remains free and nobody has made an evidence based evaluation of why government intervention to support recycling will deliver net benefits to the UK. It is faith not fact based. The local food/food miles lie continues to be spread by the protectionist farming industry and the BBC.

So how about NZ?

NZ political winner: John Key. Having inherited a revitalised National Party from Don Brash, a general public mood of tiredness with Labour, John Key has been quick to put his stamp on the National Party and flung it towards the left. He too is having a honeymoon period, he too is following the lead of David Cameron in ditching previous policies and philosophy and generally being “nice”. He too is leading Labour Lite.

NZ political loser: Don Brash. Having revitalised the National Party from its worst ever electoral result and bringing it within one seat of victory, Brash was hung out to dry by his own party. The public never did this, National’s public support remained generally above Labour’s, but the wets in National discarded Brash with the support of a media generally lacking in intellectual rigour. Brash lost because he failed to be himself, and be upfront and honest - the characteristics that saw him do so well, the characteristics that are an anathema to most politicians.

NZ political nutcase: Dick Hubbard. One of the most ineffective Mayors Auckland has had in recent history. He has surrendered control over to his leftwing council which is now embarking on its grand Auckland takeover strategy with the ear of Helengrad. Labour supports Hubbard despite his strong esoteric religious beliefs – you know, the ones that put him closer to the Exclusive Brethren than atheism – but it’s ok because he supports Labour

Number 1 NZ political theme: Corruption and lies. Corruption ranging from almost all Parliamentary parties using taxpayers’ money to fund their propaganda campaigns, but Labour the most. Labour’s litany of lies and unwillingness to face the facts of its own fundamental misjudgement. Labour with its United Future and NZ First lickspittles voting to retrospectively legalise this theft. Labour now promoting that this theft be made compulsory every year with a ban on private donations to parties. National for overspending its broadcast spending money by failing to consider GST. Taito Philip Field for giving favours for getting favours. Nicky Hager for writing a left wing attack on Brash without revealing his own personal political agenda and most of the media for not questioning that he had one. Labour for accusing Brash of National leading an orchestrated campaign of attacks against Helen Clark and Peter Davis regarding their marriage, and then leading a campaign against Brash about his own. Labour for endlessly spinning the non story that the Exclusive Brethren led a campaign against Labour and the Greens, with moral support from National – as if this is wrong in a liberal democracy.

Most enlightened political moment: Bernard Darnton, Libertarianz Leader commencing legal proceedings against the Labour Party and Helen Clark over breaches of the Electoral Act and Public Finance Act.

Internationally?

Global political winner: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. While continuing to pursue “peaceful” nuclear energy in the guise of a weapons programme, he has avoided further economic sanctions. He continually leads much of the political debate in the Islamic world, wears his anti-semitism on his sleeve and still the West tries to placate him. Ahmadinejad has shown that the Islamic Republic is still solid, that the West gives few articulate and reasoned responses to Islamism, and he can grab the attention and sympathy of much of the Islamic world. He is liked more in the West than George Bush and Tony Blair

Global political loser: George Bush. Having lost the congressional mid-terms, the ongoing difficulties in Iraq, he has lost much momentum for the last two years of his Presidency. Possibly the most hated political figure alive today, he has often failed to communicate clearly what his objectives are, and could hardly have less sympathetic media. With his foreign policy goal in Iraq well out of reach, and domestic policy about to be stymied by a revitalised centre-left Democrat majority in Congress, Bush faces a difficult repositioning as Republican nominees for the 2008 presidential election will want to stand apart from him.

Global political nutcase: Hugo Chavez. After talking of Bush as being the devil from hell, and bribing voters with the vast oil money that Venezuela is bringing in for now, Chavez continues to be the Western socialists’ favourite rebel. His own penchance for roughing up political opponents, corruption and crazy rhetoric are ignored.
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Global environmental scare in decline: Genetic engineering. Fewer are scared of it now than ever before. The doom merchants have quietly shifted towards climate change.

Why are they low income jobs?

For the same reason that houses in Murupara are cheap. There are more people providing them than people wanting them. The price of unskilled labour is based on how much there is, vs how much skilled people are prepared to pay to not do jobs that literally anyone could do.
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In short, there are too many people out there prepared to undertake low to no skilled jobs because they do not have the skills or experience to do anything else.
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It is a matter of supply and demand.
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So what is the solution? Adjust the supply and the demand.

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The supply will only go up if you pay them more, because it becomes more attractive relative to semi-skilled jobs. The more you pay people to do something the more they will do it.

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The demand will only go up if people have more money to spend on their services, like cleaning. So tax cuts may increase incomes for the poor. The demand wont go up if the price for their services goes up.

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A socialist would say “because they are undervalued”. Who by? If you value these low income workers then go on, set up a competing business and hire them what YOU think they are valued at. You’ll have to charge people for that, which probably means some sort of “fairtrade” business whereby you say your business costs more, but pays better wages so there is a “feel good” factor. Go on, do it – stop moaning about how others treat those on low incomes and you pay them. Bet you don’t, far better to force others that act yourself. However I guess anyone who hasn't sacrificed their time, money and reputation to create employment wouldn't know better - far easier to just apply for jobs expecting others to create wealth opportunities you can share in, rather than do that yourself.